The Flat-Iron Lady

Hi all you unkempt citizens of Newfoundland and Labrador!

My name is Kathy Done-derdale and I am a beauty consultant of sorts.

I have just the magical beauty tool to  achieve the look I THINK looks best on you.
(Unfortunately, it is not the one that you want or envisioned!) 

It's called the Newfoundland Labrador Flat-Iron (Budget 2013)

It works like this. I take a few strands of your collective hair (aka vital public service), say things we don't need like

health care
school boards and teachers
human rights
wildlife officers
justice system
adult basic education
career consultants
public servants
tourism
fisheries
immigration attraction
business attraction
rural development
public washrooms (coming soon!)

and bit by bit (with your back to the mirror) I "flatten" each one of them into nothing.

You won't recognize yourself (this province) when I am through with you!

That's the beauty of my hair-brained scheme - it flat lines everything in one good session (except Nalcor of course). 

And just like any good flat-iron, I can turn it from Warm to Medium to Hot as Hell!

Opps, sorry ... I smell something burning ... did I scorch you?

No?    Well let's ramp up the heat on that damn flat-iron and burn every last hair off your head! (if not now, then in Budget 2014)

There now - you look just wonderful without hair (vital services)!

My pleasure.

KD | Your (unskilled and knowledge-deficit) Beauty Consultant


P.s.  Tom Marshall will rue the day he called me the Iron Lady  that has compassion.

I'm better than that!  I do not have any compassion  -  I flat-ironed that out too!

Customer Service just wasn't my thing. 

Thanks for the vote just the same!




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